Summer love may be fleeting, but fall romance is getting set to bloom. Falling in love in the autumn is the grown-up equivalent of going back to school. Let me explain: Back to school — in France, where I live, it’s a huge deal known as la rentrée — is all about hope, special outfits and new beginnings. Just like dating. Whether you’ve already had an affair to remember or are eager to have that experience, today’s Daily Dose aims to inspire lovers everywhere.
- Fiona Zublin, senior editor
how to fall in love
1. Is It Blind, Though?
Photo-first apps like Tinder have only exacerbated how much looks matter in dating, but a growing number of apps like Lex and Taffy are trying to change that, refusing to let you judge a book by its cover until you’ve gotten to know the book through a little conversation.
It might feel like falling in love is a matter of fate, but one study found that people could regulate their “love feelings” to fall deeper in or fully out of love with their partner or ex. Study participants looked at photos of the person in question and tried to reappraise by focusing on the positive or the negative — so maybe try that at home? No guarantees.
A Canadian meta-analysis of 43 studies involving 11,000 couples found that happiness was mostly determined by the quality of day-to-day interactions, not by fate or dating app details like personalities or interests. Mutual commitment, enjoyment of sex and a feeling that the other person is happy were the key components of a lasting bond.
The tragic love story of Grace Gifford and Joseph Plunkett — who, on a May evening in 1916, wed in jail by candlelight just a few hours before he was shot for his part in Ireland’s Easter Rising — became an international sensation, drawing support from abroad for a successful independence movement.
In the late 1800s, Joe Lobdell (who lived as a man despite being assigned female at birth) and his wife, Marie Perry, roamed the northeastern U.S., preaching, living in caves, raising a baby bear cub and arguing for women's rights, including suffrage.
Not everyone has to go through such shenanigans for true love. But when Queer Eye’s Karamo met his fiancé for the first time, he tipsily picked him up — physically! Luckily, Karamo's partner gave him another chance.
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and baby makes three
1. Dad Test
OK, obviously a bag of rice is not a baby. But researchers have found that the way expectant dads interacted with a bag of rice used as a stand-in for a baby was actually a good predictor of how they’d behave when faced with their own child.
2. The Crowd
Sometimes baby makes more than three. With nonmonogamy on the rise, polyamorous families with three or more parents are finding ways to navigate the legal and social pitfalls of their unorthodox situation.
3. Monkey Business
In the 1930s, Dr. Winthrop Niles Kellogg, hoping to promote the power of nurture over nature, raised his 10-month-old son alongside a baby chimpanzee in Florida. In the end, both chimp and human took on some of each other’s traits — and the experiment wasn’t much use to scientists, given its single data point.
French data app Happn aims to inject a whisper of destiny into your online dating life by connecting you to people you’ve physically crossed paths with. Of course, that’s meant adjusting during COVID-19, when people aren't crossing paths as much.
Dutch tech firm House of Haptics markets its Hey bracelet to those in long-distance relationships, though technically you could share one with anyone far away. Claiming to mimic “real human touch,” the bracelet allows you to squeeze the wrist of your loved one (and get a squeeze back) from afar, as if to say, “Is your ringer turned on?"
3. Affairs of the Heart
Not all tech benefits you. Online romance scams, in which people cultivate a romantic relationship online only to bilk their “beloved” out of money, are on the rise in 2020, according to the FBI. As of last month, Americans had lost $346 million this year to such tricks.
Today on ‘The Carlos Watson Show’
She's the woman who took on a Supreme Court nominee, but there's much more to Anita Hill than that hearing. Today she joins Carlos and discusses the career that could have been, the Hollywood #MeToo commission she led and the faith she still has in the Supreme Court. What would she say to the offer of a Cabinet position from Joe Biden? Watch now to find out. And be sure to subscribe to the OZY YouTube channel to be notified each time a new episode drops — and be entered for a chance to win an invitation to a Zoom taping with a celebrity guest.
He was pretty perfect, as men go, and so when he proposed to a divorced mom in her 50s, it all seemed too good to be true. Well, SURPRISE, it really was too good to be true. Because when our author was getting ready to hear about husband and wife and forever and ever? What she heard instead led to a shocking discovery: Her fiancé had five other fiancées.
We all love a good love story. The against-all-odds elements. The unlikely pairing. And in the case of two upcoming media darlings, the we’re-going-to-take-over-the-world part. All according to plan and schedule. Whirlwind romance and all. Then a visit to the doctor’s office and a diagnosis that is no one’s definition of “feel-good”: cancer. Not the kind of surprise you want but the surprise many of us will have.
Going dancing isn’t going to happen for a while yet, but this couple devoted their date nights to learning complex dance routines (which we’re sure will delight da club when everyone can return to said club). But if that fails, an old-fashioned walk can do the trick too.
2. Dinner Outside
Social distancing probably means you’re not into eating at a restaurant. But that’s all the more reason to step up your picnic game, like this couple, who set up their own solo dinners at picturesque locations, complete with table and cutlery.
3. Or Just Talk
The pandemic has turned everyone on hookup apps into Jane Austen characters, writing back and forth for weeks before meeting and even setting each other challenges (like writing a poem). That getting to know each other, some hope, could be a permanent part of online dating, making it safer and kinder for everyone.