Richard Milhous Nixon had a good deal of style. He was undeniably himself no matter where he was, but no one ever said anything about that style being good. The full force of Nixonian weirdness came into its own in the Watergate scandal some four decades ago, when we were provided with a guidebook on how to not do what he did, which was: make everything about 10 times worse than it might have been.

So, forthwith: an OZY guide on getting by when you get caught.